So when the time comes for our own orgasm or release there can be a "let's get it over with" attitude with little focus on pleasure and enjoyment.
We say that it is important for the woman to communicate with her partner and let him know what she likes verbally and through her moans. While some women may find it hard to express themselves verbally, for many, moaning and emotional exclamations of pleasure come naturally.
But what about men and moaning? I feel that some men don't moan at all because it is just not macho. I know I felt that way many years ago. If you look at romantic movies in the mainstream there are very few examples of the man moaning, but I am sure many of us can remember ones where the woman does like in the movie "When Harry Met Sally". I had a very understanding partner years ago and she encouraged me to moan, breathe, and express my emotion during sex. It really helped my sex life and I had much better orgasms.
I know I feel very good and happy when my partner has an orgasm. Women have similar excitement an happiness when they know they are pleasing their partner. So telling your woman what she is doing feels good is like giving her a compliment. Your moaning also lets her know she is doing well, is a turn on for some women, and can lead to mutual orgasms.
Every man is different but here are a few reasons why I did not moan. I thought my moaning sounds were weird and showed a sign of weakness. I wondered if my partner would be distracted or turned off by it. I did not think men were supposed to moan.
Moaning is an expression of emotion. It is okay and helpful to express your emotion in the bedroom as a man. Here are a few tips to get into moaning:
1. Set aside a time where the woman just focuses on the man and bringing him to orgasm.
2. On the way to orgasm, have the man focus on his breathing, talk about what feels good, and encourage him to moan.
3. Take your time and perhaps bring him to the edge and stop a few times before bringing about release and orgasm. This will cause a buildup and help the man feel more comfortable about moaning and maybe even forget he is doing it.
4. Release: At the point of orgasm let yourself go. I call it release because it is a release of tension, pleasure, but also emotion. If you feel like screaming out, do it. Let your body go and ride the wave.
5. Not everyone gets to this point, but the release of emotion has to be allowed. As you are about to release let your thoughts flow forward to your lips. What comes out is usually very emotional. "You look so hot leaning over me like that!" "Oh my God I love the sound of your voice!" "I love you so much!" Then when you release the emotion flows with it and in some cases it is very intense, maybe including tears.
6. Once you have done this a few times and feel comfortable, try it during intercourse and other sex play.
7. Be yourself and do what is comfortable. You can moan soft, medium, loud or all the above, don't stop yourself, let it flow. If moaning is not comfortable, focus more on the breathing and letting go. As a minimum trying 1-6 above will certainly be fun.
The bottom line is moaning is a form of communication. For great sex, I suggest men do it too.
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